If only we recognize that being true friends with our Children is the best way to instil morals to, then we won't bring up Children whose confidence walls have been shattered. There are other ways to punish a Child: we all could remember how painful it was when our parents restricted us from playing with our mates, or when we were forced to stay indoors and rest? Don't get me wrong, I didn't say Children should have pats on their backs when they do wrongs. Showing love and discussing with your Children always, will help to mould them to what you want them to be. How many of us can proudly say my child is my best friend? How many of us discuss life issues with our children? How many of us pay attention to the emotions of our Children?
Spear the rod and spoil the Child has been one of world's biggest fallacies. The 'rod' doesn't mean you should flog your Child to death, doesn't mean you should inflict injuries to your child as punishments. One thing we should know, is that Children don't heed to force and brutality. When we learn to love our children and see them as friends, then we would have a Society of pretty responsible children.
FOOLISHNESS IS FOUND IN THE HEART OF A CHILD BUT A WORD/ACT OF CORRECTION QUICKLY DRIVES IT AWAY! the bible explains it all. another passage in the bible tells us that"DICIPLINE YOUR CHILD WHEN HE IS WRONG"this explains it all.you and i know that some children can be so sturborn that you begin to doubt if truelly you gave birth to them,its that bad! our personalities are different and we think and act differently also,children react and respond differently also,for some the use of koboko has helped,for others its way out of lin
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ReplyDeleteThis isnt an argument to win or lose... Child upbringing requires a multivariate approach... And it takes Understanding Parents/Care givers/Guardians to achieve... Everything is necessary AS FAR AS IT IS NOT ABUSED! Even talks or Loving words can be abused.
ReplyDeleteI wont hav my child trained in countries where the dont hav Sound child upbringing culture. I wont have my child tell me: Dad shut up. Or Dad im done talking to u, lwave my room.
Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, He shall not die. Proverbs 23 :13...words from the wisest born of man that ever lived.
ReplyDeleteI hated my dad. I grew up hating him. He used to flog the hell outta me. Whenever i got to school,friends would ask if i stole. I couldn't even tell my friends that my father flogged me like i was a thief. Flogging a child doesn't neccessary mean they'll turn out to be great adults. Showing love and care is the greatest way to show your kids morals.
ReplyDeleteThere's no clear evidence or proof that caning a child has instil good morals and obedience." Caning instils fear in kids, and its result is only temporary... it might make them behave accordinly only in the short term! ...and talking about short term, to humans this could be about 6-10 years. I mean, I don't know what words you could possibly tel a kid under 6years of age that would make such meaning more than a few cold whips. I have a little boy with me in the house, he likes making sounds with objects...any object he could get hold of. funny enof, as you take one from him, he turns around and picks the next. He had pushed down a standing fan before he was one... I don't know how to speak loving words to him to stop him from trying to make sound with my Android device!..lol
ReplyDeleteFlog your kids when the 'NEED' arises. After flogging them,bring them back. Explain to them why you flogged them. Love is the greatest. My dad has never showed me love,that part of my life is void. Flogging is neccessary,but make sure you chastise them with love. That's the greatest gift.
ReplyDeleteremember me flogging my little daughter for wetting the bed with urine. After such act, i realized that she started developing this fear for me. She tried as much not to urinate on the bed again, not because she has learnt a lesson, but because she's afraid of me.
ReplyDeleteShe hardly play with me, and prefer to play with her mum because of this fear factor have instilled in her through cane, so one day, i called her, and apologized to her. Oh! She's just 2 years plus. And after that apology, my daughter began playing with me again confidently and happily. Its all psychology!!
What am trying to say here is that, beating a child does not change the child but only bring fear factor to the child. My dad beat a hell out of me when i was young, but yet, i still repeat those things he beats me against because i know all he will do is to beat me and that's all. Am always ready to take the cane so long, i satisfy my want.
One day, my dad called me, sat me down, and tell me if that's how i want to live my life. After having some words with me for less than 30 min, i wept my eyes out, and changed totally.
So, cane is not the ultimate, but words are. If cane can change a child, then Nigerian children who are used to beating would be the best in the world.
You don't abuse a child and call it training, talk to them, try to scold them by withdrawing some certain things they love most. You can seize their favorite toys, you can grand them, and you can even ban them from watching their favourite TV station like cartoon, you can withdrew them from going out etc This things hurts kids most and often make them to bring out the best in them so as not to be punished by their parent. But canning them, that's way to ancient and primitive. This is 21st century, so i will advice we move with time and don't let time leave us behind.
Cane them, call them back later to correct and advise them with love. That cane is important. The abuse is only when they don't understand why they were canned and that is mostly the case.
ReplyDeleteThe problem we having these days is that we have terrible parents who cannot show good example to their kids. Spoilt children or badly trained has grown up to become terrible parents. But those that campaign for ban on spanking have got it totally wrong. I'm sure they don't have any good plans for the children.
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